3 am and 4 coffees later....

ok not my typical piece but duty calls so i had to come up with it....

Policies Policy:

Whereas, we would like to convey in a most somber & legalitarian fashion that the policies henceforth stated are in no way to be altered. And whereas tampering with any and all policies will result in heavy finage and corporal punishment. It is thus established that the use of this OnePoshShop.com implies unconditional acceptance of these and any other policies we deem necessary including but not limited to: fanmail, flowers on Posh birthdays, free iced coffee and forced labor in our warehouse. If for whatever reason the shopper feels unable to abide by the above and below and left and right statutes, please shop anyway - hey we're just kidding!


Privacy Policy:

So this is where we assure you that the information you send us is for our use only and will not be sold on the blackmarket to telemarketers wearing satellite antenae that screen for and track the precise time of your dinner. We also assure you that what you agree to purchase in each Posh order is exclusively the items you placed in your shopping bag and not any additional purchases such as an island that is stuffed into the pocket of a Posh skirt for which you will be billed a small fee of $450 on the 3rd Thursday of every other month until eternity.


Order Policy

YOU MUST ORDER - and that's orders!

Or in nicer words:

Online:
Please browse our wonderful online catalog and feel at ease making purchases using our fully secure server. If you feel the need to ask any further questions please email us at info@oneposhshop.com.

By Phone:
We accept phone orders 24/6 via our reliable, polite and ever so friendly voicefemail at -------. However, if you call during our business hours of 9-6 EST you may chance upon a human. If you feel startled, uncomfortable or othewise insecure about this, feel free to hang up and try again later - you may actually reach our voicefemail.

By Fax:
If you would like to order by fax please send it to ----- - we do however ask that every fax order include a note of accolade for the Trois Soeurs.

International Orders:
We will be overjoyed to ship overseas however our system is overrun and underconfigured to accomodate such shipping calculations. Please place all international orders by phone. See phone orders below for further details.

Cancelling or Changing an Order

If you would like to cancel or change an order that you've just placed, please call ------ as soon as the idea dawns on you. If we still have the order in our possession we will gladly accomodate. If we no longer have the order in hand but the mailman is still within view we will gladly chase after him for a small exercise fee. If the order is well on its way the order can not be cancelled and must be returned or exchanged.

Payment Methods

We accept any form of real, non-fraudulent American money.
Please note: Monopoly money and Hebrew School Torah dollars will not be accepted.
We are currently in the process of arranging a barter system - please check back if you:
Wash floors, do nails, or other useful services.


Shipping Policy

While the above title suggest otherwise, Posh no longer sends packages via ship.

What we will do however is process your order within 1-2 business days. Please keep in mind when selecting your shipping options that we ship business days only, excluding all major and Jewish and major Jewish holidays. If your item can not be shipped due to backorder or other unforseeable problem we will notify you immediately.

Shipping fees are based on your order and the shipping method you choose.

Return Policy

Let's be quite frank - anything you buy from Posh is beautiful, perfect & you love it. So if you have found even the slightest reason to return it - you better think twice. If on second thought you still wish to return it - well go ahead, we have to let you because of that sign we have buried somewhere in a pile of junk that says something about 100% customer satisfaction.

Standard Return Policy:
We will gladly refund or exchange any non-sale items less the cost of shipping, within 30 days of receipt. Sale items may be returned for store credit only.

We highly encourage you to track your returns as we will not refund any item we do not receive.

Please note, we cannot accept returns for any reason after 30 days of receipt. Nor can we accept any returns or exchanges that have been worn or otherwise soiled.